bridesmaid dilemma Q & A- can’t we all just get along?

1st January, 2011 - Posted by Lia - No Comments

Q. Two of my bridesmaids have a rocky friendship past but I want them both in my wedding, how do I handle it? 

A.  Having a bridesmaid feud can be super stressful and awkward on everyone. However, you and your bridesmaids need to remember the reason why they are bridesmaids in the first place: to celebrate you and your fiancée getting married. The drama and rocky past need to be set aside so that you can enjoy your big day and so that they can be a part of it as well. If they can’t has out their differences on their own as adults, then you may need to calmly sit down with the both of them and explain that this wedding needs to be drama free. Remind them that this day is about you, and you need them to act like the friends that they are and set their differences and opinions aside.

Q.   Can I fire a bridesmaid?

A. Nobody likes to use the word “fire”, as your bridesmaids aren’t employed or obligated by any means to be a part of your wedding, it is an honor and privilege, not a right. However, if a bridesmaid is continually causing you stress, grief, and anxiety due to immature behavior then you do have every right to politely explain that they are no longer to be a part of your bridal party. It may end in some tears and the cold shoulder but you  need to do what’s best for you. 

Q. My bridesmaids keep making negative comments about the bridesmaid dresses I picked out, should I change the style or color?

A.  Your wedding day is about what you and your groom have worked hard for to plan and prepare for your special day. Naturally, this means that dress choices and colors should be you and your grooms’ (if he wants to help) decision. Of course you want to pick out a dress that flatters all of your bridesmaids as well as a color that they all love but truth of the matter is…you can’t please everyone! Remind your bridesmaids that this is your special day and you hope that they can grin and bear it on your wedding day. If you want all of your bridesmaids to feel satisfied in whatever dress you choose, then give them a color swatch and material you want each girl to wear and have them pick out the style that suits them best. This way each bridesmaid can pick out a dress that compliments their style, body shape  and figure. 

Q. How many bridesmaids can I have?

A. There is no magical number of bridesmaids you can have in your bridal party. Each wedding is different as it depends on how many close friends you have, or how many family members you want in your bridal party. Another thing to keep in mind that many are not aware of is the fact that your numbers do not have to match up with how many guys are standing on your groom’s side. There is no special rule for  how many groomsman or bridesmaids should be on each side, or if it has to be even. You can have a maid of honor who’s your best girlfriend, or your best guy friend, same goes for your groom. Expand your wedding party criteria past the traditional rules and myths you think you have to follow, and select the wedding party that YOU want.

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